I have a confession to make and since we're all close friends here, I'm hoping you won't judge me too harshly when I tell you that I'm dreaming of things I don't have, but wish I did.
There. I said it. I confess that I miss my smaller, cozier, cottage-style home and I want to go back to living smaller and cozier.
I know...I know...bloom where you're planted and all that, and I have no choice to do just that. But a girl can dream, can't she?
We bought this bigger home thinking we were going to have my MIL living with us, but shortly after buying it, she had to go to a nursing home permanently. Now here we are with lots of space and just the two of us 99% of the time and it just doesn't feel warm and cozy.
When all the kids gather here, it's plenty of room, and that's nice to have a big living room and dining/kitchen area. But when it's just us, it feels too spread out and not quite the feel that I love.
However, the reality is that we can't move. We haven't been here long enough to put out more money on something else or to get the equity out of this home. But that hasn't stopped me from dreaming about a cozy cottage on a small lot, somewhere out there. Did I also mention...we have almost 2 acres here and we just don't need that much land to care for.
So what do you do when you're here, but you want to be there? You find ways to bloom where you're planted and make the most of what you have, because being discontented is not the attitude I want to live in.
This means I will have to find ways to bring a cottage feel to this bigger home by adding things that feel cozy, such as some garden fencing, roses, outdoor decor and whatever else I can find that is inexpensive to do.
The quandary is, how much to do and spend, when you know it's not your "forever home" as they say. But then I've always said...leave it better than you found it and you will have been a good steward.
🌺
Have you ever bought a house and then regretted it? Have you have downsized or upsized and wish you hadn't? What would you do in this situation? I'm just looking for stories that relate to mine. If you have a house story, I would love to hear it!
As always, thanks for visiting!
Until Next Time...
Blessings!
It's interesting, the twists and turns that life often takes. I totally understand wishing for what you don't have, and I think we all do that on some level with something. I can't relate to a move, per se, but I knew when we moved into this home 22 years ago this year, that I loved it so much that I said it could be my forever home. I was sad at the thought of leaving here once we divorced, but I'm getting to stay now. Well, if that's the Lord's will...and if it's not, then I've asked that He would help me to be okay with anything that comes. I pray and hope that you'll be inspired to find ways that will make your new home feel reminiscent of your cozier, smaller cottage. I hope you're well, my friend! Happy Easter to you and your beautiful family!
ReplyDeleteHappy Easter Jennifer! We have to hold our plans loosely, don't we? We just never know what's around the corner, but we can trust that His plans are better than ours :)
DeleteI do believe things happen for a reason, and it just takes time sometimes to see the reason. You will make this home nice and cozy, I know it.
ReplyDeleteI think we have all had regrets about things in our lives, we make the best of them.
You got this.
Cheryl, your comment has stuck with me over the past few days :) The Lord may have a greater purpose for this house than I can even imagine. Thank you for the encouragement.
DeleteI haven't regretted a house, but have regretted other things! That said, our house is cozy but when we have all the kids, or groups of friends over, I wish we had more space. Most of the time, it's good though. I know you'll be able to do things to make your home feel more like a cottage, and when all the grandkids come, they'll have room to play!
ReplyDeleteMari, that is a positive note about this house. We certainly have plenty of room for all the grandkids and a nice big driveway for them to ride bikes and a nice yard to play in. Lots of positives :)
DeleteWe live in a place too big for two of us .
ReplyDeleteWe wanted to live in the country.
This place was dirt cheap for five acres fully fenced.
It was not my cottage dream home but it is now.
I painted it cottage green with antique white trim.
I found small wooden scrolled brackets for 5 dollars
each and put them in in the corners of doorways.
The hollow core doors were ugly and cheap looking.
I had my husband paint the doors white and make
faux bead board panels with wallpaper and pieces of
trim. We put antique style door handles on them.
You can not tell they are cheap doors at all.
I bought gorgeous scrolled glue on ceiling tiles.
They look like punch vintage tin.
They are made of Styrofoam!
They look like the real thing for little money.
I shopped estate sales,garage sales
I wish I could show you how dreary and dismal
This place looked.
Now people come and tell me it's like a bed and breakfast!
It's light,sunny and cozy.
You can do it too. When you don't have lots of money to
spend use creativity.
As far as the property is concerned
Plant some native plants and trees.
Let it go naturally. Instead of constant maintenance.
Put in a bird bath and a feeder out.
You can't do it all at once. Pick a room
and look through magazines for inspiration.
It seems overwhelming at first.
But tackle one thing at a time.
Paint is a cheap way to start.
It completely changes a room.
If one decrepit old lady can do it anyone can.
Savannah, lots of inspiration here! Thank you :) It sounds like you've done an amazing job!
DeleteOh Debbie, I do relate and have confession to make. Remember my post a while back you know I had dreamed of a Bed and Breakfast. I have to make ajustments now as a caregiver for my dearest. I would love to have a beautiful bedroom with spreads and pillows and facny sheets and new curtains. Buth the reality is, in our small unit the bedroom and extra bedroom (media) room have to work for my dearest. He needs the bed rails on his side, the walker, the cane an electric throw that doesn't match...SO, I decided the back half of our unit will the the "Nursing Facility" and the living, dining and kitchen can be decorated to my desires and I will call it my B&B. You are making adjustments, and I know the Lord will show you new ways to make the big look smaller and more cozy. Make yourself a "Cozy Corner" you can retreat too. Loving your honesty and sharing this part of your life! Loving you big time today.
ReplyDeleteWanda, as always your heart shines through, even in the hard stuff of life. Thank you for your confession and a little glimpse into your life. You always inspire me :)
DeleteI have not had those feelings about my home - it's furniture for me....my daughter in law thinks I have a couch addiction but truly it's just Russian Regret (rush and regret). We want/need something and I don't take enough time to look at all the options, see what's best for us. Fortunately, we've found homes for 4 of the past couches and I've made peace with what we got. My latest is an overstuffed chair and ottoman I bought from Amazon - it looks so cozy (and sort of it) but it swallows me up! My husband told me today that if I can find a new home for it and promise to really, REALLY shop before making another purchase, he's okay with it. Please pray......
ReplyDeleteJulie, this made me giggle :) I have had many couches over my lifetime and many chairs. I will rearrange and change things until I get it right. I hope you find one you can live with :)
DeleteOh my goodness! Yes, we bought a house in 2013 that just a couple of weeks after, I KNEW it was a mistake. We lived there 4 years for the same reasons you gave for not moving sooner. Made my husband miserable with my complaining. Learned some much-needed lessons in the process.
ReplyDeleteBut you’ve got it right: do what you can to make the place the way you like. With time, memories of special times will accumulate and who knows, you may come to love it.
Mary Engelbreit has a graphic that says, “Don’t do what you like; like what you do.” That tells me to learn to adapt. You’re on the right track with “bloom where you’re planted.”
Thanks for the honesty, Barbara! I knew I couldn't be the only one :)
DeleteI have been right where you are. Back in 2000, We sold our Big home with 21 acres and had plans to rebuild on a lot in town. After living in a condo for only 4 months this house that we now live in came up for sale for a very good bargain price. We bought it, still with plans to build our dream home. This is an older home and not all what we were wanting permanently. We have completely redone this house TOTALLY and now we love it. I made it a warm and comfortable home and I have so many people comment how neat it is. It is ok to dream.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement Shug :) I know this house can turn into a place we could love and I do like so many aspects of it. I just need to give it more time and see what life has in store. I'm sure your house is amazing :)
Delete((thinking)) I thought I had replied yesterday, apparently, I did not. Girl, let me tell you, when our son suddenly passed away, hubby wanted to move me back here to Florida. We got approved for a $270,000 mortgage. What a sticker shock, we couldn't find any brick/stick house under $300,000...anyways, here we are 3 yrs later and still live in a mobile home in a retirement community. Now, there is nothing wrong with this, but never in a million years did I think I would be living in a mobile home. I am trying so hard to Bloom Where I am Planted, but its hard. Preach on, smiles. AND I am slowly learning that the Good Lord needs me where HE needs/wants me. NOT the other way around. smiles
ReplyDeleteLinda, that is so true! As Cheryl said, God may have a plan for this house later down the road. We'll just have to wait and see :) Funny thing is...I would love to live in a retirement community and we're not even retired! :)
DeleteSo sorry you are having buyer's remorse. Regret? And with a house. That is a hard one. You have a great attitude and, no doubt, you will be creating all the cozy there and, indeed, blooming right there in that (larger than you expected) pretty corner of the world! I know so many special memories are yet to be made there. Be patient with yourself:)
ReplyDeleteHello beautiful Friend! I can't say I've had this issue before...but I think you're handling just right in choosing to make the best with what you've got. I think doing steps to make it feel cozier and right for you will definitely help. Or maybe down the road if you find something you like better you could rent out your house and it could pay for the smaller place? Maybe some outside the box ways to make it work. 😉💗 I hope you find the ways to make it feel cozier in the meantime and I know God sees your heart and desires and it's amazing how he make those things work out when we pray on it. Blessings. xoxo
ReplyDeleteOur first home was strictly what we could afford--not what I wanted. I hoped it would just be a temporary stepping stone. But we lived there 13 years, because the '90's featured a devastating housing market. So year by year, with very little money, we made it nicer. As you know, it was all about blooming where I was planted.
ReplyDeleteYou got this! You can and will make that house your own. You will come to appreciate what it offers, change what you can, and accept that some aspects will never be to your tastes. Best of luck as you begin to change your world!